Slideshow image

For those looking for a way to center, I recommend listening to Reverend Elizabeth’s morning prayers, which are posted daily to the website (https://www.stgeorgecadborobay.ca/church-without-walls/prayer)

I have tried to make a habit of listening to her in the morning to try and set my intention for the day. Now, let’s be honest my intention for the day is sometimes to change out of my PJ’s into proper work clothes, but we are all doing the best we can and I am learning to give myself grace. 

Today, Elizabeth encouraged listeners to ‘reflect on a time when God has drawn near to you, even as you’ve tried to move away from God or hide yourself from God. What does this experience tell you about God?’

Moving into my third week of isolation this question felt very relevant. I am currently in this game of tug o’ war with God, drawing close then pulling away, navagating what it means to have faith in a pandemic. Though I have played this game of tug o' war before I can never remember a time in my life where I have not felt the presence of God, even if it was small. My worldview is dependent on a belief in the existence of the divine and I am content in the mystery that is faith.

As my sister in law once said to me ‘maybe that’s why you can have faith, because you don’t need all the answers.’ Which may be correct, however when I am confronted with a world looking for answers and Christians who are putting belief above science my faith becomes challenged.

So, I find myself hiding from both the world and God, questioning my Christian identity and starting to ask questions. Will things ever return to normal? Will I lose my job? Will my best friend who is an anesthetist in the USA contract COVID19? Will I ever be able to travel again? and most importantly will I ever be able to eat that ice cream from the beacon hill drive in that I am craving!? I find the anxiety overwhelming me.

But then I hear people banging their pots and pans at 7pm in my neighbourhood, thanking our healthcare workers and the light of the divine shines. Or I am out on my balcony practicing yoga on a cold sunny day, I hear the seagulls and feel the gentle breeze and then their God is again. Or I spend the evening for the first time in I can’t remember how long talking to my partner, no screens and no distractions and again I feel the sacred.  

So, what does this tell me about God? I am reminded that when the world becomes overwhelming for us, that does not discourage God from being present in it. I am learning that as Christians God calls us to a discipline of faith, because it is a choice, a practice. Which has only become more evident to me over the last three weeks. I can choose how I spend my time either watching the news or being on the phone with a parishioner or friend. I can choose to have compassion and help my fellow humans by staying indoors. I can choose to trust in the holy spirit who is still moving and speaking to us.

As we approach this holy week I am concentrating on the idea of resurrection. When everything seems hopeless and dark there is a hope and that is the Christian message that God is asking us to spread.

Want to spread some light? 

Send a message of thanks to our hospital workers in Victoria

follow THIS LINK and scroll to the bottom of the page.